Monday, October 22, 2007

Hmm...happiness

weird world around

A dying tribe
trying to inscribe
wat they say is right
whatever is good is their sight
self pity by demeaning others
enacting happiness as reality smothers
they call it fun
they call it creation
inside they run
from their own frustration
remaining souls try to battle it out
become deaf when others shout
keeping their patience all the while
determined to win in the last mile...

Saturday, October 13, 2007

The triangle of happiness

A senior architect today said a very interesting thing, he told me about the triangle of happiness....all through life we keep trying to balance it...

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Taking Sides

taking sides
burning hides
walking by
continuous try
searching path
unfinished start
longing roles
confusing souls
disturbed past

Monday, August 27, 2007

Incessant Droplets




incessent droplets fiercely they flow
turbulent thoughts dont know where they go
flooding beliefs or constrained mind
Superficial reliefs or discouraged blind
Downright emotions yet honesty questioned
undettered devotion yet reality unmentioned
guided wind doesnt know where it goes
troubled waters, are they waht they show
sunny dreams yet clouded ways
these droplets teach how life plays

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

That thing called Confidence

Confidence is a strange thing.
A thin line it draws in any person.
More of it and it harms because it bounces against what is possible by our selves in the society, more of it and it hampers the way in which we interact with the society.
No doubt the region of over confidence is considered or tagged as bad by the society.
And there is under confidence so called to be no confidence at times (but I believe “no confidence” does not exist). No confidence is considered bad again by the society and hence I believe that every one needs a confidence ratio that lies between the two and everyone juggles between the thin line of confidence….shifting to over confidence at times and no confidence at the other, his acceptance about this in public is another issue. This drift is what gets a person running in different instances. If somehow one masters the stability between confidence and no confidence life seems to be more successful or easy to live…..but the strangeness of this thing of confidence remains ….

Sunday, July 22, 2007

strange times

Frozen Moments
crazy sentiments
strange proximity
doubtful ability
Magic touch
emotional clutch
limited time
still a long way to climb.......

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

My way

Waiting to be the natural me
I guess that is when ill be what i want to be
long hrs of confusion and mess
its time i collect it all and worry a bit less
its time i live my life i see my dream
its time i unleash wats left within me unseen
i guess the winds besides me shiver me at times
that is when the world doesnt seem to rhyme
how long will i drift along the bay
if i dont carve a path its here ill stay
higher i want to rise
but whats high is not precise
no more do i want to stray
its time to ride to the future.....my way

Friday, June 15, 2007

In pursuit of....... Success

This part of my life...is called success

I have been wondering many times over the meaning of this word called success ( i even check the spelling everytime i write it). So many times it gets to me to be the most successful person, just to ask myself....what is successful....to be the best..to be the winner....but best winner are all relative to what we are doing...i can bet on it many friends of mine will pull my leg over this statement considering that i see so many things relative (except for relatives).
But what striked me today while watching " Pursuit of Happiness" a will smith movie was dfferent.
I was watchin the movie the second time with my parents but yeah....it did give me a different perspective....i run across success....to know what it is and how to gain it...and i guess everyone does,....but i failed to see the success of my parents till date...

My parents, both of them ....as i see it now have been extreemely sucessful....successful in making their dreams come true....

it must be some 23 years back when they were removed from their house....both were stranded...they struggled every bit of their survival ...but never gave up...no they arent national heroes to be put up on news channels ...but what they have acheived together so far....is remarkable....

Mom .....grown up in a business family with grandad (unfortunately whom i was never able to meet)) being a business man.....nani never wrked ....But mom stood on her feet.....entered teaching proffession....then got married to dad....but with that came a family which was not so rich ....with not so much respect towards education....but she survived...
even when growing us up with her job situated in a very remote place....she survived... And she made sure that her kids knew what survival was ....she disciplined us...especially me in a very required manner...perhaps thats what makes me what i am today...

Dad....grown up in a family where he was the most hard wrking and he is till date...he even had a time when he had to feed his family(before marriage)....but he didnt give up....his wasnt a rich family....but surely was a biiiig family....
but he lived with a dream....i somehow find that dad is where i get my ability to dream......he dreamt of constructing a building ....a home...becoz he didnt have one for himself...so he wanted his very own home....he did it...the very buidling we live in today was made by dad's sweat...he dreamt of having his own house in the village.....he did it,....he proved that he can do it ....he is the one who takes challenges and proves that they are possible...
If u see from his job perspective he had a govt job....but his dedication showed the never say die attitude....thats again where i got mine from....
Dad wanted to be a lawyer....and today after retirement he is one....again his child hood dream....and he did it....i respect him the most for that...

Writng about my parents i can fill up pages....but what i see today is that both of them have a family that is more or less stable..they are leading a comfortable life..apart from lifes own problems......their kids are well off....myself studying in NID and my sister as a manager....they must be so proud...
whatever they could do for both of us they did....but also lived their own dreams....

its not just motivational films or dialogs that should make the difference....i guess...i need to see my parents when i am down....because...if i think someone is success ful....they are the one....now this is no karan johar film ..ending with..."its all about loving your parents" but....its something which i observed...and i am proud and lucky to be a part of my family....
its this what my mom and dad have acheived....i guess its only called "Success" ( i hope i spelt it right)

Monday, May 21, 2007

Big v/s small

When u go with a good Name of a company the client comes to you because of your name and you dont have to do the initial presentations to convince the client.
But in case of a startup company we have to convince the client. This helps us undertand the project in detail since the stake of the project is more and the fear of losing the project makes u work.

I guess the same is with good colleges. When a part of a good college we generally tend to put less efforts because we know we will get a job anyways. But when u come from a small college you have a tendency to put more efforts from your side because the only way to get a good job is by what you are

and not what your college is.....think about it

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Altruist

What am I searching
Where am I going
Is it right all that I am doing
Then why is this question so confusing
I search I seek
But what is true what is that I see
Strange in thoughts where will I land
I try to be true but where do I stand
What is true
Something right for me for you
What is this world a place to live
Live by the rules or make our own
Make mistakes and then forgive
Trying to do things unknown…
Do I need to know
Or should I just ignore
This life it seems
So very unsure….

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

finding faults

finding faults
blaming self
life halts
goes in shelf
who is to blame
not me nor u
just the moment
which made us belive
life goes on anew
few stay back
others start to live...

Saturday, April 21, 2007

keep running

running across the meadows
running across the terrain
running is all what i do
i keep running even in pain
but till when will i keep running this way
this body needs some place to rest at bay
some corner calm with nothing to run
some caring shoulder just helping me shun
Just a peaceful moment to get back what i am
a cozy bed to to stop me in my timespan

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

A world beyond my own….

In silence I tread with mysteries alone
Fostering thoughts inside me they had outgrown
Searching for answers within myself
I seeked something to get out of my shelf
Lost in circles where vision was absent
I got a hope, a will to transcend
A dash of smiles, a sense of self
A trickle of joy pushing confusion up the shelf
The value of me today I have known
When I saw a world beyond my own….

Sometimes when your own world seems all unbearable and confused all it takes is a look outside our own window, a look into a world outside ours and someone around to talk to.
Just some moments of life beyond your own makes you realize what you have been searching all alone…

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

just thinkin...

Human beings dont like to be told how to behave
They dont like to be told that something is eternally ideal and should be followed unless they ask for
such an intervention conscioslyHowever when unconsciosly the same occurs it is called as an influence.The moment one realizes an influence as an influence one doesnt like that.
As Humans We always seek control in everything that we do. And the realization of an influence makes us
fear the loss of control. When humans are told by other humans that something is good or bad which is controlled by the creator.
The creator accepts such an intervention only when the intervention is asked for.
The ideal is defined in each of us and considered as the ultimate truth for us. But when the ideal is challenged of an attempt to change the ideal in head by others or the environment, human mind gets defensive or uses an excuse like hatred or incabability to not change.The eternal search of every human is to be stable and remain stable in all directions. Perhaps that is
the reason why it is said that human by core nature is a lazy animal. The human mind seeks stability from the chaos that exists within it. And as soon as it gets the imagery of stability it opposes any activity or influence from the environment to be unstable again.However the concept of being stable in itself is a fallacy. Even if we feel we are stable we are not it
is that we are able to supress the unstable characteristics unconsciosly and try to belive to be stable.
At times of heavy confusion we try to build up and put across a feather of stability by not looking at the unstable aspects in fear of unstability in itself.
This explains the mental state during gain of new knowledge or insights. During such a phase when we target a stable mind we are in a extreeme unstable mind. When knowledge that our stable self has no idea is gained it tries to modify our state. Now this causes a fear of state change to the unstable. It also makes us feel a loss of control unconsciosly which explains the uneasiness during such a period.However if the gain of knowledge is conscios and the moment this knowledge makes meaning i.e. becomes a part of a our stabe state the self becomes less baffled and less confused.
Now think of the designers mind while defining something totally new.....

Monday, March 26, 2007

sudden realizations

simple emotions
complex expectations
imaginary assumptions
sudden realizations
lost soul
living in illusion
complex role
perpetual seclusion

Saturday, March 24, 2007

thin line

Thin line between ego and self respect
Thin line between what u giv and wat u expect
Selfless soul or selfish whole
We create our own role
Good for one bad for the other
One turns foe the other turns brother
When selfless hurts selfish rises
But is it selfish or just being thyself
Rejection turns to endless bound
Selflessness becomes less profound
Something real or something unreal
Its just this mind playing games in the end
Searching for answers we fight so far
In the end thin lines make us wat we are

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Thanks Naman

My friend NAMAN wrote something for me....the context was his ipod
"The path of the GIZMO FREAK is best on all sides by the inequities of the tyranny of technical failures but blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill, shepherds the e-distressed through the valley of TROUBLESHOOTING for he is truly a GIZMO FREAK himself and finder of lost electronics and I shall strike down upon thee with extreme vengence and furious anger those who wish to poison my brother and you will know I am your lord when I lay my vengenge upon you."

Friday, March 16, 2007

Naked emotions

Every drop of tear
Every smiling smear
Is leaking out
Is showing out in fear
Not a tint of emotion is left within
Even the smallest wound is left unseen
Open in the sun with everything to show
Not a piece of real is left for me alone
Dry tears have bloated in the sky
Pouts of sympathy question me why
Just falling raindrops in the dark end spaces
As naked emotions lie in transparent spaces

Thursday, March 08, 2007

....3

alms of sympathy flow around
tragic life yet happy sound
distant places of silent thorns
invisibly creating tears unborn
confused mind rolls over the conscience
keeps swaying around the real reasons
if life is cruel so be it
what is cruel? ur own demerit
good bad right and wrong
everbody tries to sing their own song
truth scares yet how much is true?
i keep finding life and so do u

.....-2

Hungry stomach yet lazy soul
Structured thought yet confused role
burdens of work yet nothing to do
i keep doing my thing which i dont belive
passing hrs yet nothing in hand
many people yet barren land
broken hearts yet happy faces
crocdile tears yet genuine aces
silent rumours yet loud thoughts
in the end in vaccum someone rots....

...

I had friends but suddenly dont have any
I live my life as if i have lived so many
Silence is sweet yet sour somewhere
Alone is good yet it does scare
if searching is all i do
what in the world will i ever belive
wicked world yet sweet reality
broken bridges yet no calamity
virtual emotions as if life is new
painted smiles as if they were for u
scribbled lines yet no meaning
filled up brain yet no cleaning
serios paths yet nothing rhymes
i keep writing all thes weird lines